Source: yahoo.com
When I was younger, I dreaded aging. The term “midlife crisis” hung in the air, and I watched people inch toward their 40s and 50s with a watchful eye. A steady job and a faithful career were paramount, whether that made you happy or not.
Now, with my own 50th birthday just months away, I see midlife for what it actually is: The time you’re most in touch with who you are and what you truly want. In a world where you now have so many options, your 40s and 50s can be the time when you ask yourself: Is this how I really want to spend the rest of my life?
For Karen Marsh, Barbara Rowlandson and Kimbilyn Charbonneau, the answer was a resounding no. They each walked away from familiar jobs, steady paycheques and the comfort of “what they’d always done” to build second acts that feel more aligned with who they are now. Below, these Canadian women share their second-act stories that are anything but a midlife crisis.
After 24 years in the classroom, Karen Marsh of Collingwood, Ont., found herself increasingly disheartened by the impact of social media on her students. At 50, she knew she wasn’t ready to retire, but she was ready for something different.
When she spotted a posting for a humane education coordinator at the Georgian Triangle Humane Society, the lifelong animal lover felt a spark. “That job opened a door I never expected,” she says. Marsh went on to found the GTHS Humane Education program, which helps young people build empathy, compassion and emotional resilience through their relationships with animals.
But Marsh is quick to say her career pivot didn’t happen overnight. It took her about five years to find her footing.
She watched her parents stay in one job for their entire adult lives. At first, a career change felt anything but normal. People questioned why she was walking away from a steady paycheque, a pension and the security that came with teaching.
“These kinds of decisions come with fear and uncertainty, and a grieving process for the identity you’re leaving behind,” she says.
But mindset is everything.
“It’s easy to see a career change as starting over,” she says. “But it’s harder — and far more rewarding — to see it as building on everything you’ve already learned.”
Feel like it’s too late? Hardly. Marsh says she had a sense of self, emotional intelligence and resilience.
“Midlife is not too late,” she says. “It’s actually the perfect time. … Take the leap, even if it’s messy or uncertain. You’ll either find your next calling or discover something vital about yourself in the process.”
Barbara Rowlandson of Coboconk, Ont., built a successful career in event management and marketing, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing. She liked her work, yet she often felt her career didn’t carry the impact or meaning she craved.
But at 45, everything shifted. Rowlandson fell in love with a woman and ended her 21-year marriage to her husband. After navigating those major life changes, she felt called to help others who might also be struggling.
At 50, after two years of careful consideration, Rowlandson decided to go back to school to pursue a master’s degree in counselling psychology.
Her youngest daughter is completing her undergraduate degree, something Rowlandson says has had a real “bonding effect.” She says being on a similar timeline as her daughter has been a gift. They talk about their courses, commiserate over assignments and compare goals for the future.
She also loves that her kids are watching her embark on this journey and hopes they see that “it’s never too late to change your life, no matter what the obstacles.”
Rowlandson is now in the final phase of her degree, working directly with clients and hopes to carve out a niche supporting LGBTQ people at all stages of coming out, as well as their allies, friends and family.
“Doing this work makes me feel like I’ve come home — like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be,” she says.
In her early 40s, Calgary resident Kimbilyn Charbonneau began feeling restless in her IT career. She’d been renovating her own properties for years and quietly wondered if she could turn that passion into something more.
During the COVID-19 pandemic, when she was off work, Charbonneau finally had time to pursue that passion. She launched her interior design business in 2021 — but it hasn’t always been easy.
“I’ve felt like an imposter — not talented enough, not smart enough, inexperienced,” she says.
She credits the design community with helping her get through those low points, calling it life-changing to have a group of like-minded people in her corner. She adds that her husband has also been supportive, constantly encouraging her to keep going and reminding her she can do this.
Even now, Charbonneau admits she still second-guesses herself at times. But seeing her clients happy makes it all worth it: “I really can’t think of anything else that makes me more satisfied.”
She’s grateful her work now allows her to “interact with more people in a meaningful way,” adding she’s “not on endless calls all day at the mercy of some company’s big agenda.”
If she were to offer any advice to women looking to make a career shift midlife, it would be a reminder that you can’t expect to do this all on your own: “Look into ways to reeducate yourself and find a community that will welcome you in for what you want to do next.”
Considering a midlife career pivot? What to know
Shannon Russell, a women’s business coach and author of Start Your Second Act, helps her clients break down their goals into actionable steps. If you’re considering a career change, the first thing she recommends is creating a list of all your skills and experiences from your past roles. Then, cross out any roles you’re no longer interested in. Next, take the remaining list and think about which skills would help you in the role you’re looking to move into.
“Once you get out of your head and actually start allowing yourself to think about how you may fit into this new dream role, it becomes more real,” she says. Above all, keep the “why” in mind — what’s driving you toward the shift?
Russell also helps her clients assess their current financial situation and determine the steps they need to take to make their dream a reality. She says that’s an important part of the equation; many of her clients stay in their current roles longer to build a larger financial cushion. While every career shift is unique, she recommends having at least six months worth of savings to support yourself.
It’s also fine to keep your new goal to yourself, especially if you expect resistance.
“You don’t want to share your dream idea with someone who may not be supportive, so holding this close to the chest while you work on your next move is always OK,” she explains.
These pivots can be especially challenging when you have a partner or family to consider. To help navigate difficult conversations, Russell advises doing your research and having a plan in place before confiding in your partner.
“Having a plan laid out as far as your finances and timeline go will help answer questions your loved one may have,” she notes.
When you feel overwhelmed, “give yourself grace and take it one action step at a time,” Russell says.
A big change doesn’t happen overnight, but as these three Canadian women prove, it can change your life.
